I am 50 years old, actually, almost 51. I was born with a uterus that, up until about ten years ago, did what it was supposed to do. Granted, we have had our spells of contention, such as the adolescent years when we were both trying to figure out how to behave. But for the […]

Roxanne was my first. She was always precocious and smart, an old soul my friends used to say. She and her sister, who was only 17 months younger, were best friends. In fact, her little sister was a late talker because Roxanne just talked for her. Roxanne was also very open and honest. She never […]

October 1st, 2017. It was a beautiful, sunny day. I had gotten up in the morning, had some coffee, and went to the garden to clip some dahlias that were in full bloom.  Later that morning, my husband and I decided to go out and ride our ATV’s to enjoy the lovely early fall weather. […]

We lost our daughter, big sister, best friend October 1st, 2017. There has been so much that has transpired since that date that all our lives have been inexorably changed forever. But one of the hardest things that we had to do was to clean out her house. My husband, her aunt, her best friend, […]

  The waves crash down on me. They tumble me around, the saltwater stinging my eyes, the turbulence filling my ears. The sand and debris catch in my hair and scratch my skin. My heart is pounding like thunder in my chest. My breath escapes my lungs in bursts as I frantically reach in all directions. […]

Today is September 1st. In exactly one month it will have been one year since my daughter, Roxanne, died. And as that day draws closer, my anxiety increases. I’m not sure why, but it’s almost as if the more time that goes by the further away I feel like she is; like, the more time […]

I have to be honest, The Wizard of Oz is one of my all time favorite movies. Since I was a child I have always loved it. It has everything: a girl trying to figure out who she is while rebelling against the unfair persecution of her loyal and adorable dog, a flying house, a […]

When I was growing up, I always knew that I was adopted. Every year I had a birthday, and then I had my “special” day, which was the day that my mom and dad received me. Granted, I was only three days old when they got me, but it was a day we always celebrated. […]

My paternal grandmother, Edna, and I always had a strange relationship. Don’t get me wrong, my Nana loved me with all her heart. In fact I’m relatively certain that she loved me more than just about anyone in her life; and by that I mean she loved me unconditionally. And I loved her…tentatively. There were […]

Today I was looking through old photos for a project I’m working on. And I wasn’t even looking for photos of you. But there you were in every memory of my life after the age of 20. And now you won’t be a part of my memories nor those of your children ever again. I […]